- friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food
- me: can i have some
[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”
“sure thing son whatchu need”
"’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their right to say no."
Me? a Heterosexual? What kind of ridiculous accusation is this? What is this? What is
"i just need to get my shit together"
on a scale from 1 to sansa stark, how much do you regret your childhood crush
Life tip: bring a book with you everywhere you go
Life pro tip: bring two, in case you finish the first one.
Bigger life pro tip: Bring a kobo/kindle with you everywhere so you have an entire library with you at all times.
Ultimate life pro tip: live in a library and never ever leave.
Supreme life tip: Become a library